My Truth

For 34 years my truth (belief system) was that I was “the girl allergic to the world”. I saw myself living a life that was destined for one allergic reaction after another. A life that was built upon day-to-day thoughts about how to minimize my allergic reactions, while balancing marriage, kids, work, and social interaction. Everywhere I went, thoughts of “whose wearing perfume or scented laundry detergent, are their animals in the house, can I use this soap, can I touch this cart, where is my hand sanitizer, will I stop breathing if they accidentally put dairy in my meal” along with so many others consumed my days. More and more I lived in fear of what might happen in nearly every moment of every day. And overtime my husband and I built a safe cocoon in our home where I knew I was mostly protected. However, worry, doubt and fear led me to be very wary of venturing outside my protected space, and I began to hibernate more and more. 

No wonder I was always exhausted! 

Well, I have now said GOOD-BYE to that dialogue and hello to a NEW ME!! I now KNOW that I am healed. I now understand that all these reactions were merely my body shielding me from the world to protect me; that I no longer need protection and I am FREE to live in peace. FREE to live in pure health. FREE to explore the world, and trust that I am safe. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am not going around shoving cheese into my mouth (which in the past, would require an EpiPen and possible hospitalization). I am being smart – but not fearful.  I am trusting, believing, knowing, that I am Whole, that I am fully healed. I am also getting the care I need to back up that truth. I am living in a space of knowing I am healed, while also understanding that there is still clean-up to do. My body struggled for 34 years with severe allergic reactions, so I now get to be patient with getting it back in balance. Each day, my motto is “I am willing to go as fast as the slowest part of my body is able to go” (thank you Karen Druckers for your wonderful song that handed me this motto). 

This is the time period that means the most in my life. Yes, I had a baby, married an amazing man, and graduated from college, which were all huge milestones that I mark as some of he best things I have accomplished in my life. But the last few years have been life changing in a very different way. The past three years have changed EVERYTHING I thought I knew about who I am in this world!

Where do I begin? Let me step back just a bit.

Summer of 2015 my family and some friends rented a lake house on the Delta in California. Water skiing is my favorite sport, and I was so excited to be in my happy place with my family and friends! However, within a few short hours of being in the water, I broke out in a crazy rash all over my body. It didn’t take long to realize I was having an allergic reaction to the Delta water. Now, to my defense, the Delta is surrounded by farmland, and I am pretty confident that pesticides run into the lake on a regular basis. But still – come-on! Within a day I was in the ER and spent the rest of my vacation in the extreme heat- unable to go in the water. 

Over the next few months, I continued to have more and more allergic reactions. Places I could once visit were no longer were safe for me. I was even having reactions to things in my own house, my safe space.  I had already been seeing Stephen Jarsky, DAOM, L.Ac. for several years, and to be honest, I don’t believe for a second that I would be alive if it weren’t for him. Stephen Jarsky uses muscle testing to determine which herbs my body need at each visit. At that time the herbs gave me peace and greatly reduced my suffering. They also kept my immune system somewhat stable, reducing the number of illnesses I had, and the length of time I was ill with each occurrence. Prior to working with Stephen Jarsky, I was getting bronchitis several times a year, and I could actually feel my immune system drop in minutes prior to getting sick. However, although they helped a lot, the herbs didn’t seem to be enough. In March 2017, my sister looked at me and said “you are dying. Enough!” We talked it over and she scheduled an appointment with a renowned Functional Medicine Doctor in Massachusetts. And off we went. 

Fifteen thousand dollars later, I was told that I was allergic to everything. – No shit:). He sent me home and said he was going to send me some allergy drops that he wanted me to use. However, after taking one drop of the formula he sent me, my face broke out in welts all over. Then he suggested I try worms. Yes, he sent me literature about worm therapy, and was hoping I would be willing to swallow live worms to see if it helped my gut biome. No thank you. I’m not mocking it, as it might be a great solution for some – but definitely not something I was willing to try.

Although that doctor was definitely not for me, I did learn a lot through the experience about functional medicine, and I knew that was the right path for me! I soon found another functional doctor named Dr. Craig Mortensen. His office was 2.5 hours away from me, but I loved him so much it was worth the drive. And he was A LOT less expensive! 

I worked with Dr. Mortensen on many issues starting with the most pertinent, my cortisol levels. I had severe adrenal fatigue from my body fighting so hard for so long, and I was in danger of no longer producing cortisol. For those of you that are number people, my cortisol levels were .6. and once they reach zero, I would be in trouble. He made it clear that my body would not withstand synthetic cortisol and that I needed to bring it up quickly. My first assignment was to nap every four hours! I LOVED that doctor 🙂

Over the next year,  Dr. Craig, worked with me on getting rid of the yeast overgrowth in my body, calming my overactive immune system and gut responses, and healing my liver and kidneys. We focused more on detoxing my liver, but that happened very slowly because every time I detoxed, it came out through my skin, setting me back. Overall we made great strides in calming my body down and reducing the number of allergic reactions,  however there was still so much to do. Due to the drive and the fact that he didn’t take insurance, I began looking around for another Functional Medical doctor and that was when I found Dr. Palinasamy – in San Francisco. Ha ha, the joke was on me because I went from a 2.5 hour drive to a 6 hour drive!

Dr. Palinasamy was an MD that took my insurance, and he also specialized in auto-immune diseases, so I scheduled my first appointment and, six months later, drove to San Francisco to see him. 

Now it is important to take a step back and mention that in that same year I made a few drastic moves – literally! My husband and I sold our house and moved to the beach; something my doctor had been suggesting for years. I also began listening daily to Reverand Micheal Bernard Beckwith at Agape and infiltrating my life with positive affirmations, music and spiritual lessons. I then sought out a local spiritual coach and began seeing Keya Murthy. She taught me about energy in relationship to the body and how to meditate. I was a complete novice in this area, yet something resonated deep in my soul each time I saw her. She also conducted healings that supported what Dr. Craig was doing. Keya inspired me to look for answers within, as well as outwardly.  

Now, back to Dr. Palinasamy. While I was in Northern California waiting to see him, I was staying in my brothers motor home, as I could not go into his house. I had been very ill and had a severe allergic reaction to an antibiotic so the rashes were even worse than normal. The day before my appointment I had a meeting with a healer over the phone. At that time I was desperate and willing to try anything! I got the surprise of my life when she knew things about me that she shouldn’t have known. In fact, one of the first things she discussed was the molestation at age 14 by a group of boys. She said this trauma had a lot to do with all the years of suffering, and that me not telling anyone was detrimental to health. The craziest part of her appointment was that I woke up the next day completely clear of all rashes! Gone. Completely clear skin. How was this possible? That was the day that I realized the role that energy truly plays in our lives, with regards to our health. I told myself that day, that if she can clear the rashes over the phone, then I must be more in control of my healing than I eve thought! But where do I start? 

Dr. Palinasamy kept me in San Francisco for a week while I took tests and we waited for the results. In our second meeting, the first thing he told me was that I needed to go home and begin seeing an NAET practitioner, immediately. NAET? What was that? I had never even heard the term before. Upon returning home with a new care plan, I began my research on NAET (Nambudripod’s Allergy Elimination Treatment: www.NAET.com). 

My first appointment was with Dr. Mala Moosad in Orange County – 2 hours away from home. And once again, the first thing she asks me about is the trauma I experienced between the ages of 13-15. Ok, this is not a coincidence! 

With NAET, the visits are weekly and short (about 30 minutes) so I decided to find one closer to home, which led me to Dr. Gary Erkfritz. The man, the legend 🙂

I saw Dr. Gary just about every week for a year. We cleared away the energy from the two sexual traumas at ages 14 and 15 and worked on many other imbalances in my body. Each week, we would clear away something new, addressing a variety of issues in my life. We focused on allergic reactions to specific foods, traumas, emotions, cellular memory issues from grandparents and other family members. We even dealt a little with past life traumas that had carried into this life. Don’t fret, if you don’t believe in this, the NAET doctor would never address it! 

One aspect of NAET that used to be so puzzling to me, is that I could not handle the treatments by myself. In the beginning I was getting very sick and feeling a lot of pain each time I would have a treatment. The treatments themselves are harmless. The NAET practitioner has you hold a vile of the items you are treating for (or the energy of it) in your hand. They then put a machine (similar to a gentle massager) up and down your spine several times. It has to do with brain and body balancing. Anyway, after a while, I became fearful of going to see him so Dr. Gary suggested I use a surrogate. That is when Grace Enriquez came into the picture. She was my surrogate until Dr. Gary retired, now she is my NAET doctor and we are working out the surrogacy concern using other individuals. 

Back to my story: Slowly but surely I became stronger and healthier. The allergic reactions reduced tremendously and my recovery time when I did have a reaction reduced as well. I began trying new things, going places I had been afraid to go, and even traveling a little. I was still requiring the magic herbs, so I viewed Stephen Jarsky, Dr. Gary, and Grace as the magicians  that were giving me life again!   

Until…

May 2019. I had been doing so well that I dared to go on a business trip to Washington DC. I held my energy the entire time and had a rockin’ conference. I even changed my flight to surprise my daughter (Katelyn) in Washington State for Mothers Day. While I was in Washington I sat on Katelyn’s couch, with her dogs hair all over it! I had zero issues! What! I believed I was healed.

1.5 days upon my return from Washington State, I broke out in a painful rash all over my body. From head to toe, the rash was everywhere. The herbs weren’t helping to reduce the symptoms, and Dr. Gary was on vacation for three weeks. When he returned we figured out it was an allergic reaction to the fabric softener I had been using for many years. They must have changed their formula, right?

Once that cleared, I had another reaction to chlorine in our shower water from the new house we had just bought and moved into. Again it was everywhere. So red, so irritated, so painful. We cleared the reaction to chlorine and boom, another allergic reaction to something I had been around for many years. What was happening? Stephen Jarsky was stumped, as his herbs had been helping all along to reduce the symptoms and make life functional for me. Yet they were no longer working. Dr. Gary was stumped as well. Three months in and still no answers. Just one reaction after another. 

I clearly remember the day that Dr. Gary told me, as tears dripped down his eyes, that he had no idea what was causing it all. He said it was coming from within my body, but he could not pinpoint where. Walking out of his office was one of the worst days I had experienced in a long time. On that sad day, all hope was left behind as I got into my car and drove away. 

That Sunday I sat in my bed crying. No, sobbing. If Dr. Gary and Stephen Jarsky were stumped, what next? There had to be an answer. I reached out to Lynn, the psychic healer, via email but knew I would not hear back from her for awhile. I then reached out to a Physic Medium, Jessica Sh. I had been referred to her by a friend and quite frankly, I was desperate! My initial meeting with Jessica changed me forever. She told me that my body was pushing out a trauma from when I was between the ages of 4-7 years old. She also told me that alcohol had a lot to do with my liver problems because I had been drinking during the second two traumas, and always put partial blame on myself for the fact that I had been drinking. Now, with that you must know that I have not been able to drink for many years. My doctors have said I have the liver of an alcoholic, yet I don’t drink because when I would drink my immune system would drop, and I would become very ill within a few days. Puzzled, I walked away from our appointment once again thinking of the correlation between energy and the body. 

After speaking to Jessica, I remembered that Dr. Gary had told me a year ago that I had another trauma when I was a young girl. I had adamantly said “no I didn’t, I had a great childhood” and made him stop probing. I went straight to Dr. Gary’s office from seeing Jessica and told him what she said. He did his magic muscle testing and agreed I had been molested. His tests showed that at the age of 6 years old my neighbor, John hurt me badly. I didn’t want him to treat me for it, as I knew I needed to process it all first. After-all, I had no memory of it whatsoever. 

I left his office stunned. How? Why? Where? Is this possible? 

I felt nothing. 

Once I got home I checked my email to see if Lynn had responded yet. And she had. She said that I needed to be gentle on myself as I was releasing sexual trauma from when I was age six. 

What? That was the third person in one day!

I then reached out to my mom and found out his last name, John Smith (he has passed on so I have no problem using his name). Instantly upon reading his name, my body began to tremble. I shook and my body spasm’d for about 45 minutes, at which time I knew this shit was real. I looked him up online and found his obituary with a picture. At first site, I screamed, as I knew he had hurt me badly. 

The next day, the flashbacks began and they were something I could never imagine. Horrific. That man was a terrible, terrible human being. He used tools inside me. He pushed me. He shoved me. I was six years old. Just a baby! 

The weeks following consisted of appointments with Dr. Gary and Grace, Stephen Jarsky, my hypnotherapist, and my spiritual counselors. I have never cried so much in my life. In fact, I cried, I screamed, and I spent many hours hiding in my bed under the covers as my husband tried to console me or get me to leave the house for a bit. 

Overtime a period of about three months the flashbacks subsided. The pain lessoned. The rashes slowly disappeared. Yes, the rashes disappeared! The allergic reactions to everything I touched, ate, or smelt stopped, and I felt as if I could breath again. I knew I was going to be ok! In fact, I slowly started to learn that I was going to be more than ok. 

I knew I was healed! I knew I was safe in the world.

I knew this was the answer, and I had pushed through the hardest of times and landed on my feet on the other side! 

My blogs share a lot more about my miraculous, life changing, wonderful, crazy, difficult, scary, healing process, and why I am so grateful for all of it!